dear creators & all involved with the CW's "Gossip Girl",
you and your show are not cool. your recent poster that was plastered all over my fair city was predictable. unfortuantely, given your shallow viewpoints and base taste in entertainment (hence why you have a job on a show on the CW), you probably greenlit this add compaign because you imagined this to be "racy" and "cutting edge". bummer, because most people view it as tacky and foolish. all it was was good ol' fashioned shock value - which is tired and flimsy. shock value is usually the dumb man's version of art. angles, vocabulary and story telling are the thinking man's window to truth and art... try leaning on that instead. i imagine you probably justified the decision to use these posters w/ something like:
"it's not like kids don't hear that kind of language at school. kids talk that way. it's not our fault. we're just depiciting the truth of real life."
the difference is the unabashed glorification of vulgarity masked as art.
the people who created the XFL also thought that show was "edgy" and "fun". desperate housewives still has a large viewership - anyone ever watched a whole episode of that? it'll pull your brain right out of your head, it sucks so hard. bill maher and bill o'reilly still think that they help their respective causes by debasing the other side and it's supporters. so stupid. people still watch the bachelor and the real world - and i have no idea why? actually that's not true - i know why. because people will not stand up. unfortunately we digest whatever is put in front of our faces. and until those who's job it is to decide what to put in front of our faces strive to have more integrity, it'll never change. we are lazy. stop being lazy and trust your true instincts and intuitions - your conscience. that's where truth resides. a person doesn't go to the strip joint because they've thought it through and through and in the end, it makes a lot of sense. no they go because they are lazy and are selfish. if i have to sneak around, lie, and it ends up hurting others, oh well....i'm a man, i need certain things. so stupid.
i certainly believe that art should be a mirror of life and the human condition. and true, sometimes life is ugly, but there is a definite line between telling the truth and glorifying something that is crude and unnecessary - which in 99.9% of cases can contribute to the break down of the human spirit - which is the opposite affect you should be looking to get when creating. my opinion is that art is to help us as people figure out our roles in this planet more fully.
so, grow up Gossip Girl. be responsible. kids watch you. have some dignity. none of us likes growing up and taking on responsibilities, but that's what happens. and when you join the adult world you have one simple decision to make: either you're going to provide a positive example that encourages the younger generations to be leaders and selfless, or you're going to be a cynical and negative force that assists kids in growing up hopeless and damaged.
calvin (sales clerk): umm..lou? lou (store manager): yeah, calvin? calvin: uh, while on my smoke break i noticed that part of the sign out front... lou: what? calvin: i was saying, that i noticed that the sign out front... lou: what sign? calvin: the one in front that says the name of... lou: yeah yeah, the one that says the name of the store. uh huh, what about it? calvin: well, it's uh, missing some, there are some lights that are... lou: what? some of the lights are too bright? calvin: no, they're not too bright. actually... lou: is it the picture of the little lightbulb, you think it's ugly? calvin: no, it's not that the lightbulb...it's not ugly...it's just that the lightbulbS...you know plural... lou: what? you think i should have spelled the end of BULBS with a "z" instead of an "s"? makes it cooler, maybe? calvin: no, it's not the letters. i mean, it IS the letters, but not... lou: i'm sorry calvin, you're taking forever to explain yourself and i have lightbulbs to sell. and so do you. so why don't you get back to work, ok?
this guy has got to play big if this is going to be any kind of series. and Mr. Stoudemire, you better ice the crap out of whatever you've got to ice. i mean it. i hate the spurs. i will echo heidi's sentiments when i say that one of the best parts of the playoffs has been the addition of Jeff Van Gundy as NBA commentator. although Ginobili is the rightful owner of the nickname "Balki" for obvious reasons, Van Gundy will always be "Old Balki" in my eyes. however, the best JVG moment was of course when he tried to stop Alonzo Mourning from murdering Charles Oakley by jumping on his leg. hey Clippers, why don't you get this Van Gundy guy and fire Dunleavy, okay? he's kinda the coolest guy i know right now.
last week i was handed a business card from one of the background actors on Ben and Burman. my favorite part is the third prong of his title, "Liasion". does that mean what i think that means? the thing that really frys me is on the back of the card i saw my hopes dashed. i was on the verge of shooting some new headshots and he totally stole my idea for a BACKSHOT.
i play the evil Sherman, king of Hollywood d-bags. here is one of the publicity stills.
also, recently worked on my buddy Marc Clebanoff's new comedy, "Gerald" . i play a Funeral Director who really isn't all that reverent about the whole death aspect of the job.
"Someone has too much time on his hands...and with it 'someone' spruced up his goose" - CHINA GAZETTE
ok, ok, i admit it...i've neglected my one and only blog lately. the lady routinely shows a more passionate and valiant effort over at SUCK.
NOT NO MORE.
it was feeling a little dank and dark up in here, so i welcomed Spring in with a little brightening up.
and if you take a look off to your right, you'll notice that you don't have to leave the comfort of your favorite blog to enjoy minutes and minutes of entertainment - you can now view BRAND NEW videos from the geniuses at The Attack! right here, like the Earth Day inspired "THERE WILL BE ALTERNATIVE ENERGY"...enjoy.
whether it's Giselle and Douche Bag Brady or ANTM winner Eva Pigford dining w/ Giants defensive end Michael Strahan...models love athletes.
however, i'm still really confused why Victoria's Secret Model Adriana Lima would ever want to waste her time w/ the all-time most annoying and frustratng ex-Clippers point guard, Marko Jaric (i mean besides the money - and the fact that this guy gets to make money playing basketball, let alone receiving NBA contracts, is another conversation altogether).
he is a massive doofus. here and here is sufficient proof.
not to pat myself on tha back, but i am a seasoned "percussionist" and have for years followed the known protocol that a professional of such an occupation should follow.
most people would say the role of the drummer is limited to keeping tempo and making sure the rhythm is dynamic...in other words, compliment what the rest of the group is doing. but most people forget that you should also:
1) wear makeup i think the Ultimate Warrior makeup showed my stringent devotion to the letter of the drummer's law (note the very rock n' roll wooden name sign).
2) have one arm having kept all my appendages, i've never been able to acheive this level of awesome, but i did frequently wear tanktops and sport a flawless "wave" hairstyle, while playing A drum and A cymbal. 3) be classically ancient, aka 113 years old 4) have head to toe fur, a unibrow, no upper teeth and only 7 bottom teeth and wear a chain i couldn't really make these things happen either, but i did play Unskinny Bop at a church talent show with my band STEEL IMAGE. that's gotta be good for something
but nobody maximizes the role of the drummer like the gentleman below.
me w/ 1975 ABA championship coach of the Kentucky Colonels, HUBERT JUDE BROWN.
it's sad when a man who just celebrated his 973rd birthday looks more put together and fresh faced than the bloatted man-boy w/ the bifocals (note the significant dbl chin as well - in contrast to Hub's tight, glowy complexion).
heids & i on a whim up and went to New York last week. we had a swell time eating, walking, riding, writing, watching, talking, laughing, riding, watching, eating, writing, walking, & riding.
every NY trip i of course always geek out big time and end up spending close to 9 hours in the NBA store on 5th ave... and although i debated purchasing both a very inticing Kevin Garnett CELTICS jersey and a brand new Jason Kidd MAVERICKS jersey, i eventually exhibited restraint and walked away w/ just headbands to add to my beauty of a collection and a swell T-shirt . we stayed in Brooklyn's Park Slope with our friends Amanda (aka Mando Calrissian, Mandy, Mandingo Tribe, etc.), Jim (aka Broadway's Creighton James), and Mr. Martin (aka Van Buren, Lawrence, Mull, Sheen, Short, Scorsese, etc.).
here are Jim and his little boy Martin in "the study". also saw The Taylors of Brooklyn and were able to finally meet the legendary Pierson, who happens to be pretty gangsta & cool as ice.
now as far as food goes, we murdered it this trip. heids and i, previously to leaving, had been on a no refined sugar diet for 3 weeks - so naturally we felt entitled to gorge ourselves once we got to the city.
food stops included:
Max Brenner - Chocolate by the Bald Man. we made a laughable amount of stops here. i'm embarrassed to say the exact number. the inside decor looked as if Willy Wonka had a speak easy. it's a chocolate speciality restaurant and lived up to the hype. their Italian Thick Hot Chocolates are unbelievable (we sampled all 3 flavors: dark, milk and white). i imagine that Max's chocolate recipes are so rare that the ingredients are excavated through some discreet mountain in some Peruvian jungle like the golden idol in Raiders of the Lost Ark. during one of the stops to meet a friend we sampled the Chocolate Soup complete w/ fixings like malt balls, toffee chips and marshmallows. oh, and the Mexican Spicy Hot Chocolate w/ red chili, cinnamon, nutmeg, & pepper - was 100% good too. the other place we made return visits to was CRIF DOGS (113 St. Marks Pl.) in the East Village. hot dogs are obviously in no shortage in Manhattan, but in my opinion you'll find no better wieners than at Crif. we went twice and could have gone for every meal. most, if not all of the dogs, are bacon wrapped, which is the best invention of the last 100 years.
heids sampled on those two seperate occasions, the Tsunami (tiny pineapple chunks, green onions, teriyaki sauce) and the second time the Chihuahua (avocados & sour cream). i knocked out the Good Morning the first time (bacon wrapped of course, cheese, fried egg) and the Spicy Redneck the return visit (chili, cole slaw and jalapenos). the Tsunami was amazing as was the Spicy Redneck. i also had the tater tots w/ chili and it was heaven. best part of Crif is that unlike LA favorite Pink's, these dogs were not sloppy or too saucy - they were also a perfect size and not overbearing. perfect.
my sister and brother in law have raved for years about Magnolia Bakery below is their famous banana pudding, which should be included on the official food pyramid it's so freakin' addicting.
we also enjoyed The Eatery (798 Ninth Ave. @ 53rd St.). - the Sweet Potato, Corn and Grilled Pear Empanadas with Salsa Verde blew my face off.
as well as my guilty pleasure, Dallas BBQ - it's a NY chain, but it's cheap and their honey chicken and yellow rice kick Roscoe's chicken & waffles in the pants.
saw some sweet stuff at The Met.
we were lucky to see great plays w/ highlights being: The Seafarer (w/ David Morse & Ciaran Hinds), Steppenwolf's August:Osage County, Tom Stoppard's new work, Rock N' Roll (w/ Brian Cox & Rufus Sewell) and Pinter's The Homecoming (w/ Deadwood's Ian McShane, Michael McKean, Raul Esparza & Eve Best).
our host Jim is currently understudying for three of the male actors in said The Homecoming including one of Heidi's favorite English actors, James Frain. Jim was nice enough to set it up so that Heidi could meet him and then "Mr. Frain" was gracious enough to invite us up to his dressing room to hang out and chat prior to the show. it was a nice moment to see Heidi get to finally meet one of her inspirations and how thrilling it was for her.
the best part of the whole trip was being able to hang out w/ heids care free and laugh w/ her all week long. the city invigorated both of us to get to work and make the hustle happen. thank you NY.
